What happened when I learned to let go.

I don’t know what it is about rainy days, but does anyone else find that they just seem to make you super contemplative?

Just me?

Anyway, it’s currently a very drizzly afternoon here in the lakes, the type of drizzliness (is that a word?) that makes you super damp without even realising it, and somewhat reluctant to even venture outside at all.

A much as I love a good old explore, there is something about snuggling up in a cafe, drinking endless coffees and staring outside at the rain on the window pane (hey I made a rhyme) that is weirdly comforting. And, like I said, it always seems to get me thinking, which is not always a good thing, but for whatever reason today it left me feeling a little bit inspired.

So, what is this post all about. Well, I guess what I wanted to get thinking about was the whole idea of expectations. We all have them, we all can let them dictate how we see things too. I know I always struggled with  building things up in my head rather than just accepting them as they came.

And, it can be hard. Expectations can be everywhere, and with people working longer and harder, we all want to make the most of our time off. That time off then becomes so precious to us, to the point where we fear wasting it, or it not living up to the idea we initially had. Whether that be a day off, holiday or even a meal out.

In fact, I used to live solely based off of my expectations, as if I always wanted to be let down by them. In fact, I know that there were times I actually relished in being let down, like it gave me even more reason to be the epitome of doom and gloom.

So what changed?

Well, for starters I was always very uptight, I hated spontaneity or saying yes to anything even remotely unplanned. because you can’t have expectations when you randomly decide to follow an unmarked path, or try out a new coffee shop on the spur of a moment.

I guess you could say that I learned to let go (cheesy I know). I stopped aggressively pushing against life, like it was out to get me, and instead just let it surprise me. I get that all sounds very new age-y and away with the fairies, but truly it was one of the best things I could have done for myself.

Because, it doesn’t just apply to time off or a holiday. I no longer expect so much of myself. I don’t need to keep pushing myself to the breaking point physically and mentally. I no longer expect to have a career that’ll earn me lots of money and a big house. I no longer expect a boyfriend who will give me endless love and attention and security. I no longer expect that my boss at work will notice how hard I am working and give me a promotion.

Now this is not to say i’ve lost all ambition and drive in life, because I can definitely attest that I haven’t. It’s more that by no longer focusing on needing to have these things, i’ve found that if they do happen I can actually appreciate it that bit more. And by lowering my expectations, i’ve learned that I do have a lot more than I ever realised.

You’re life is what you make it. It can be a prison weighted by expectations and needs, or a blank canvas that welcomes whatever comes its way.

Wouldn’t you rather have the latter?

 

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And to end this post, a picture of me staring contemplatively at a waterfall on a rainy day

Thoughts always welcomed and appreciated 🙂

 

xxx

 

 

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Author: Amy @ Adventuringamy

Just an ordinary girl trying to find herself in this funny little world. Technical Stuff: 21 years old, recently moved to the countryside Fun Stuff: Almond butter addict, crazy cat lady and total nature lover

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